Noah Refilwe and Nkosi's Haven - the children and the saints that care for them

I spent all day on Saturday, October 28, with Linda as we visited two homes for orphans and vulnerable children around Johannesburg, Noah Refilwe and Nkosi's Haven. We have been joined in South Africa by a husband and wife from Cedar Foundation, Leigh-Ann and Greg, who are here conducting site assessments for their foundation. We also have met up with a team from Infinite Family (www.infinitefamily.org), a nonprofit that works with local South African communities to connect American adults to orphans and vulnerable children through video conferencing, email and a secure internet connection.

Noah Refilwe is not what I would have expected for my first visit to a home for children here and am told it is rather unusual. Started by a women named Jean Stewart in 1991, it is located on 18 hectares of donated land (well, they pay R100 a year for a lease, equivalent to about $14) on the outskirts of Jo'berg. Its a quiet, fairly beautiful piece of property with farm animals, a working bee farm, a small peanut butter factory and brick making facilities, all income-producing activities that allow the home to move toward greater self-sufficiency. Since it was a Saturday, all of the approximately 40 children who live there - with names such as Blessing, Precious, and Comfort - were roaming about, kicking a soccer ball, feeding goats, cleaning their cottages and doing other chores. I was surprised by the calmness of the place and the relatively few adults around for that many children. During the week, Noah Refilwe also operates a creche (a day care) for 39 infants - including several, according to the director of NR, who have been raped because the local witch doctor has told community people that raping an infant would cure AIDs.

After spending all morning at Noah Refilwe, we headed back into Jo'berg to visit Nkosi's Haven (www.nkosishaven.co.za). Nkosi's Haven was started by Gail Johnson in 1999 in honor of her foster son, Nkosi, who died of AIDs in 2001. Gail was a volunteer at a local hospital when she met Nkosi's mom, a woman dying of AIDs who had been kicked out of her village. Upon meeting Gail, the mom asked her to look after Nkosi, who was then having to roam about the streets, after she died. Gail made good on her promise and, at Nkosi's urging, she started a home for mothers dying of AIDs, their children and the orphans they leave behind. Gail told me that for every man infected with HIV in South Africa, there are 3-3.5 women infected. A statistic that some here, unfortunately, use to blame women for spreading HIV/AIDs. The contrast between Noah Refilwe and Nkosi's Haven, and the effect it had on me, was pretty stark. Whereas Noah R was somewhat bucolic and calm, Nkosi's H seemed crowded, rundown, underfunded and a more urban and chaotic. Also, since I met the mothers, all dying, I was hit much more squarely with the HIV/AIDs reality here.

We had lunch at Nkosi's Haven and spent the entire afternoon with Gail, a tall woman with dyed red hair, a lot of make-up, a heart of gold, a will of steel and a huge personality (she reminded me of an Eddy/Patsy combination from AbFab). Nkosi received a lot of international media attention in the last few years of his life, and so did Gail, and not all positive. After the media appeared, so did Nkosi's extended family from his mother's village. (Yes, the same family that abandoned her and Nkosi.) Unbelievably to me, many thought, and many still do think, that Nkosi belonged back with his family and that a white woman had no place adopting him.

At both Noah Refilwe and Nkosi's Haven, we observed the computer labs set up by Infinite Family and heard from the IF team about the impact that the American "net" family relationships are having here. I met an amazing 17-year old at Nkosi's Haven named Manini, an orphan who has lived there for 6 years. Manini sat down with Linda and me and talked about her dreams of becoming a filmmaker, her desire to go to university and how much she loved her "net family", who are Andrea and Maurice DuBois (the current CBS news anchor in NYC). She said she feels a real connection with them and loves to be able to communicate with adults. At 7:00 p.m. that evening, Manini promptly sat down for her videoconference with Andrea and Maurice - it was phenomenal.

Although tired and realistic, Gail still offered us a picture of hope. She is building a "Nkosi's Village" on a large piece of property more outside of center Jo'berg to take care of 100 new mothers and she related success stories, like that of Manini and others, with more to come for the younger ones at Nkosi's Haven. Yet, all of this left me feeling pretty helpless...at the moment, the only thing I can do is reach out to you - if you want to know more about some of these organizations and how you can help or get involved, look at their websites or email me separately and I'll let you know. Nothing is too small here. Linda told me the last time she visited Nkosi's Haven, her mother sent a suitcase of imodium for the moms there!

Pictures (I'm sure there is a way to caption these): Linda and me at Noah Refilwe; Linda with child at Nkosi's Haven; Manini and me